Lent 17


The other Lazarus

I was taught a humility
Synonymous with humiliation
I was modeled modesty
That was simply self-deprecation
And deprivation
That’s what we called frugality
So much so…
That fragility became my natural state
So much hope…
Shattered like a beggar
At a rich man’s gate

Lazarus come forth!
But not Lazarus in Jesus’ embrace
Lazarus in Abraham’s bosom
Only Heaven holds your fate
And let the dogs lick your wounds
Until you make your great escape
Turn the other cheek and walk the extra mile
They rarely foster change
And love your enemy is even harder
When your forever waiting
For him to taste the flames
Licking your whole life at your heels

No soliloquy on piety
Will make justice roll down from the ivory
So let’s bring on the rains
The mighty river’s become a babbling brook
Where peace and justice can never reign
In the muck and mire of hopelessness
My feet forever stained

But I see you, you see me
Still trying to stand up
On my own two
And I don’t know
Where I’d be right now
If sheer will
Or the desert chill
Hadn’t brought me to you
And don’t think, I don’t know
That you hold me like that church pew
Hard and uncomfortable
But closer to my own divinity
And sometimes it’s like…
Prayers I’ve tried to bury
Still asking what do you see in me?

The light shines in the darkness
It is a heart that’s overcome
But it’s self-hatred
Not self-interest
That keeps us deaf and dumb
So skip the dirt
Spit directly in my eyes
Or between my thighs
Please exhale in my lungs
You might not make me whole
I don’t think I ever was
But you just might make me feel
So I am at your heels
And I’ll pray thy kingdom come

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